On being a designer who becomes the bride and refusing to be anyone else.
Welcome to Founder's Notes. This is my first post in what will be an ongoing series where I write honestly about building this brand, the decisions behind the work, and everything in between. No filter, no script. Just me. I am glad you are here.
There is a particular kind of pressure that lives in the space between designer and bride. I know this now, from the inside.
For years, I have been designing for women who want to feel like themselves on the most documented day of their lives. Over time, I have learnt to design for feelings women do not always have the words for.
Then I had to do it for myself.
"The hardest client I ever dressed was me. I knew what I didn't want. But when you have a thousand ideas and they are all yours, and you have to choose, that is a whole different kind of work."
Designing your own wedding dress when you are the designer is a specific kind of creative pressure that no one tells you about. You have ideas, too many ideas. You know every technique, every seam, every fabric on the market. And knowing all of that does not simplify the decision. It multiplies it. I had to learn to stop designing and start listening to myself.
So here is how the day actually dressed itself.
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Look 01 The Church Dress.
 Designed alongside my mother, who is a designer herself. There is something irreplaceable about creating something with the woman who made you. It was simple, intentionally so. The church has its own energy, and this dress understood that. I loved it completely. Look 02 The Reception Dress.
Look 03 The Shell Dress. Texture and Drama.
 Almost a last minute decision but the most instinct driven one. I did not want plain. I wanted texture, the kind you can feel just by looking at it. My team sourced and pulled it together, and that is what a great team does. They catch your vision mid air. A custom shell dress that was all feeling.
Look 04 Fruché. The Star of the Night.
By my friend Frank Aghuno. I have been watching Fruché grow since the shows of 2015, back when I would make sure I was in the room. There is a particular kind of joy that comes from witnessing someone's vision take shape over years, and then one day being held by it. This dress was the drama. The moment I walked in, the room felt it. Compliments did not stop all night, and honestly, I understood. So entirely, unapologetically the best version of my personal style that I almost could not believe it existed. Frank is just deeply, ridiculously talented. God bless his brains. It was truly the star of the night. |
My bridesmaids wore Desirée Iyama too. A number of guests came dressed in our brand. There was something quietly sacred about that, about looking around the room and seeing the work show up not as a display but as real life being lived in it.
I love olive green. It is my favourite colour, and I was not going to pretend otherwise because it was my wedding day. My shoes were green. Prada satin mules, a pair I had wanted for a long time. The week before the wedding, I finally decided, the thought was simply: why is this not already my wedding shoe? So it became my wedding shoe.
My earrings were Dries Van Noten. I love baroque pearls. I love studs. I love stones. They were all three at once. My bouquet was dramatic by design, sourced from South Africa, all thanks to Ceejay.
I tell you all of this not to give you a shopping list but to tell you what it felt like to be a bride who simply did not compromise on the things that were hers to keep.
We spend so much energy on weddings trying to please the room, managing expectations, softening choices, apologising for wanting what we actually want. But you are the bride. And you are already you.
The women I love to dress are the ones who want to be seen. Not just noticed. Seen. They are not dressing to blend in. They never were. That is the brief. That is always the best brief.
If your wedding day cannot hold the fullest version of you, what exactly is it holding?
Oh, and I almost forgot. The morning started with a robe. A last-minute thought, honestly, but one that mattered. I wanted something that felt signature to DI, so my team made me a robe and a short dress just for that moment. It was never part of the original plan but that is the thing about having the right people around you. They make even the last minute feel considered. That was the look that started everything.
Speaking of the right people, my face was in the most capable hands all day. Thank you to my makeup artist @ariyike_mua for seeing me and making me feel like myself, only flawlessly elevated. My hair was done by Cassie, one of my childhood bestie @ceohairlondon, and honestly, there is something about getting ready with someone who has known you for that long. It just hits differently. And if you are a bride planning your day, please do yourself a favour and look up @tbce_event. The best bridal coordinators. You will thank yourself later.
And to every beautiful woman who wore Desirée Iyama on my wedding day, thank you. You did not just wear the pieces. You carried something of mine with you, and I felt it. Every single one of you made the day more than I could have imagined.
Every moment captured beautifully by @emmanuellaphotosgallery.